Yesterday we had our weekly study visit for Spenser. Normally we have them on wednesday, but the doc was not going to be there on wednesday, so we got to go on monday instead.
He had his meds upped again. I guess that is a good thing, but then when he was at school yesterday, he had a very difficult afternoon. The teacher wrote me a note. Now I am worried about him, even more so then before, if that is possible. I am literally sick with worry. Not fun times.
Rob had a present for me yesterday. He took the little bit of video of Spenser as an infant that we have, and put it to dvd format. This was an excellant treat. Of course then I cried like an idiot, looking at my sweet boy. He had no worries. No zooming thoughts, or impulses. Just a sweet innocent little baby, with a life full of happiness ahead of him. Or so we thought. Life just continues to throw me some serious curve balls.
Is it wrong of me to want him to be normal, so he wouldn't have to deal with life as someone who has serious issues? I am just so stressed, and and feel so helpless in this.
This is so not what I thought parenting was going to be like.
:(
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