So, I think I am turning into an airhead!
I thought I had a orthodontist appointment on Friday, which I was happy to finally have, because the braces are bugging the shit out of me. I digress. Anyway, when I finally found the appointment card, and actually looked at it, I realized the appointment was not in fact Friday the 11th of the 11th month, at 11 a.m. It was November 1. I had not even called to cancel, because duh, I didn't know.
I swear to god, my brain is turning into some gooey mush-like substance. It has to be stress, because I am not old enough to be senile. I was so flippin ticked off. Course nobody to be ticked at except myself. And you know that is always fun--not.
I literally feel like I hear the information I am supposed to hear, but retain none of it. It goes flying out the opposite ear. It is like it is on a nonstop flight to nowhere, with no stops in my brain for lay-overs!
Yes, I think I am bonkers.
Yesterday I had the pleasure of having a house full of geeks, for oh I don't know, 6 hours!!!!!!
Rob is the dungeon master, ooooooohh. How cool. I am ever in so much awe of his geekdom. He is the geek master, the nerd nobility, the dork duke! I actually don't have a problem with his weekly geek fest, because it gets him out of my hair, and he has fun, and he socializes. Geez, sounds like I am talking about a kid.
What I have the problem with, is one of the players. He is so whipped, that he must bring an extra appendage with him. This appendage is annoying. This appendage reminds of a serial killer in training. This appendage annoys the living shit out of me. The player with the appendage, used to be so audacious. He would do anything, anywhere, anytime, with no worries of the consequences. He would leer at my bewbies, and make comments. It was funny, and crude, and completely anti politically correct. It was fucking awesome! Now he is like a dead man.
It is as if he is living with a soul sucking vampire, who also happened to cut off his balls, and put them in jar, and buried them in the back yard so he would never find them again. He is so not who he used to be. It is really sad.
Yesterday he brought his progeny with him, his biological progeny, not just the appendage by marriage. So we had 2 extra guests. No warning, or anything that he was bringing them.
I was not amused.
He asks, as he walks in, when there is clearly nothing to be gained by me flipping out and telling to take a hike--
"Is it ok that I brought them?".
I am thinking--
"um, no it is not fucking alright, it is rude. I am not your babysitter, I am not watching these kids, I am not feeding these kids. Grow a set and tell your vampire stinky assed wife to watch her kids while you get 2-3 hours with your friends, you big weenie."
Of course I said--
"Oh, okay."
So I put in a movie, which they don't watch any TV at home, none. Zip. Zilch. Zero. Nada. Get the picture here?
He says as I am putting a DVD of evil incarnate in (Bob the Builder--shudder)--
"Better take them to the potty, otherwise they will just forget to go."
Meaning of course that they will piss themselves and anything they maybe sitting on.
As the evening goes on, he gets them drinks, food, another DVD or two was watched. He asked them if they had to go potty. They of course said no.
Finally it was time for them to leave(doing a happy dance). I thought I had gotten out of them being here in one piece. No.
As I went to straighten the couch, I smelled something absolutely fucking gross. That ammonia like smell that can only be dried or almost dried piss and wet fabric.
The kid(s) had pissed my couch. Pissed. Really stinky piss. Gag a maggot stinky.
I was not amused.
Thank god it is a futon with a cover that comes off. Thank god it didn't soak through to the mattress itself. Thank god for washing machines, dryers, febreeze and oust air spray. Thank god he was gone, or he would have been throttled.
So not only does his wife have stinky ass problems--that whole story is for a different day--but his kids have stinky nether region issues because they piss and do not care if they lay in it. YUCK, YUCK, YUCK.
How was your Sunday?
:)
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