I still cannot believe I went out to LA. It seems like such a distant memory now that I am back in babyland. I am happy to be back though. The people I met out there were something else however.
No one could believe that my ginormous bewbies were real. And yes I was asked repeatedly. Time after time after time I got asked if they were real. So when I would respond in the affirmative, I would get a look. I call this the "you got to be shitting me!" look. I name it this because then it is followed up by another questioning of the authenticity of my bewbage.
Then I get the "holy crap, they are real, holy crap!" look. I call it this because usually the look is followed by Holy Crap being said/shouted/repeated over and over again. Thank you genetics. You just saved me about 10 grand. Course you also cost me that much in any given year, so I guess we are even.
Also while out there, I got asked continually just how old I really was. I am sure they were hoping for some under age scandal type thing, since technically I was in what is essentially a bar. No one ever guessed my correct age, or even came close to it. While this is cool, because hey who doesn't want to look younger, it also got repeated to the point where I felt I would be better off wearing a sign that said something to the effect of:
"Yes, I know I look young. Yes, I know I look very, very young. However I have seven year old child. I have been with my husband for nearly 13 years. I have been married for nearly 8. Now do you really think I am 22, or 18? Yeah didn't think so! Thanks anyway though!"
But that would have been bitchy at best, and not amused anyone except for me, so I refrained. Again thank you genetics for allowing me to look gobs younger. Although it sucks when I get carded buying cold medicine for my child. Funny. But still sucks. Same with lottery tickets. Rated r movies. Pornos (not that I buy or rent them, I am simply deducing that that would happen there as well!). Alcohol. Lighters. Any other items that requires you to be of age to purchase it. I have been dealing with this for all of my life and most of the time it amuses me. Sometimes I think it is ridonculous (there is my fave made up word again!). Mostly I just go with it. I honestly get a kick out the shocked looked on people's faces when they read my birthdate. That and the constant checking to make sure it is not a fake ID. I suppose it doesn't help that the braces take years off of me too.
Speaking of braces, because I had them adjusted before going, my mouth felt like I had been beaten with a baseball bat. This of course made eating anything that wasn't mush a very difficult thing. I finally ended up sort of giving up on the whole food as sustenance thing. In the end it was a cool thing because I have lost 5 pounds. Hopefully this is a jumpstart to dropping about 10 more. And no, when I drop weight, I do not drop it from my boobs. Thank the gods for small favors. In fact the tend to look even more ginormous, if that is even possible. It is kind of cool! I love my assets--when not looking for a trendy shirt to stick them in!
Well I suppose that is all for now, except for this. There are certain people who seem to derive pleasure from what they perceive as making someone else feel bad. Sadly, some of those people have decided to make me a target of this behavior. While it does tick me off that people can be so petty and cruel, mostly it makes me sad for humanity. What does it say about humanity if people set out to make strangers feel bad? I think it says what I have often thought to myself. Most of the time people suck.
So flame me if you must. I can always delete the flames from the blog. However you cannot delete the hatred from your soul as easily.
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