Help, Save Me, They Are Taking Over....

This morning started out earlier then I had planned. I came out of my room, after getting showered, to hear the sounds of shrieking.

Lots of shrieking.

I thought I might have lost my mind while rinsing the conditioner from my hair.

It was maybe 7:35 in the morning. Normally the kidlets don't arrive until about 10 till 8. I was sure that I was going insane, or that my shower stall is also a portal to an alternate universe, where things like this happen unexpectedly.

I tip toe out to the living room. Thinking to myself, that I must surely be going insane.

I get into the living room, and there before me are four imps.

Faces all sort of stone like. Eyes not really focusing on anything it would appear, except the TV screen. I try to sneak by undetected.

I need my morning tea, and to be able to sit and have 5 minutes to shake out the cobwebs before the daily gimmes start.Think invisible, think invisible. If you think it will be.

Get almost to the kitchen. Think I am home free, I may get to have my tea and some sanity today.

"Robynnnnnnn!"

Shit. They saw me. Whoever said the think invisible, be invisible works needs to be shot. I want my money back.

"Hi sweetie. Let me go have my tea, and then I...."

All of a sudden this thing jumps up and sticks to my leg. Like spaghetti flung onto a wall. There it sticks. It is the two year old.

"Hi Mo. Can you please get off my leg so I don't fall on top of you.."

Because as sure as I am standing here, the weight balance on my body will shift, and I will fall over. Sadly I would end up crushing the two year old. It would be like the search and rescue for an earthquake survivor to find him. They might even needs dogs to ferret out his scent. It wouldn't be pretty.

"No. I hugging you."

"I know you are hugging, me and I love the hug, but I can't feel my leg anymore, please let go."

"No. I lubs you Wobyn."
Eyes flutter at me.

Damn it all. How can I refuse this. This sweet, innocent, little picture of two year old perfection. Chocolate dipped and candy coated is how sweet this moment is.

"I love you too honey. Can we please let go of my leg, please? I think my foot fell off in the other room."

Surely he will want to find it. Sort of like an Easter egg hunt. Kids love Easter egg hunts. Only instead of Easter eggs, it would be my assorted body parts that fall off of me, that he has to find.

"No. I want cerel!"

Translation for those not fluent in toddlerese: cerel= cereal.

"That is not how we ask."

"Gimme?" Eye flutter, grin, grin, grin.

"Mo, you know better."

"Ok, pwease can I have cerel?"

"Much better! Yes. Let go of my appendage and I will get your beloved cereal!"

My leg now is free from the two year old torture dance. I shake it to get the blood back. My tea is cold. The cobwebs, well I am sure you can see hanging from my eyelashes. But I get cereal for the boy. Because he said pwease, I mean please.

It is the small moments where I get the chocolate covered, candy coated sweetness in this crazy circus of kids all day long. Those small moments make it worth all the gimmes, and I wants. I think I like this alternate universe!

Still, hold me. I need my tea!