Spenser didn't go to school today. He was up hacking and coughing a lot last night. Just immense coughing fits. So he stayed home. I think it has something to d with the weather.
I got a little drunk last night. Rob made me a Milky Way martini, which was all alcohol, no mixer, but oh so fucking good. And because I am a serious lightweight, I was toasted. It was odd. I don't think I like it. I like buzzed, not whoa, the room is spinning.
I think things with Phred are over?
I don't know.
I don't think he is interested in me any more, which is fine, but I wish he would say so. Just so I know where I stand. It basically sucks. Because I want it to continue, but I get the feeling, that he doesn't. Maybe it's the whole avoidance thing, but he has not been around as much lately, and he never seems to know what to say to me, and just generally seems uncomfortable.
I suppose I should stop being a pussy, and ask him. However, that would be a big step for me. Don't know if I can do it right now.
Also, apparently the things that went down on Monday, shouldn't be so upsetting to me. Or at least that is how I feel when I talk to people. Because others are having much worse things happen in their lives. Ok, I understand, my thing wasn't life or death, however it was 3 fucking years of my life. A little validation that I am upset and that it is ok that I am upset would be nice. I don't want to hear, well at least it isn't as bad as x,y,z! That just pisses me off to no end.
Well that is the stream of consciousness for the day.