So last night we had parent teacher conferences for Bipolar Boy. This was the best conference we have had. Nothing but positive things to say.
Apparently he is figuring out that if he tells people how he feels, before he gets to a certain point, that they can step in and help, or at least try. This is what we want for him. To know that there are going to be limits, and that asking for help is good.
So anyway, he did not get into bed until 9 last night. Now that is late for him. We start the bed time process usually around 7:30. Early? Hell yes. But he needs sleep or else he is not well, and things go down hill quickly. Rob and I watch a movie and get ready to go to bed. Rob goes to check him, and low and behold the boy is up playing his DS. It is 11:15. Not good.
So we take the DS, and calmly explain it is bed time and he needs to get his sleep so he can go to school. This is when the shit hits the fan.
He goes from mildly agitated to screaming monster to devil child in 30 seconds flat. He is trying to hit, kick, he is crying, he is screaming, he is looking everywhere frantically for the DS. He looked completely different. It was not my baby. After about 20 minutes of him doing this in our room, I told Rob that I was going to go take care of it, and he should go to sleep since he had work in the morning.
I go into the boys room, and he is just as livid as could be. Nothing I say makes him feel better. In fact it makes him worse. He says that I want to kill him. I tell him in the calmest voice, that I do not, I love him and want him to be ok. He then says he wishes he were dead. I again in my calmest voice, tell him that no one wants that. We love him and just want him to feel better. It is at this point that I have had enough. I take him and put him in a hold, and lay down with him. Making sure to put pressure on the points that needs pressure. ( pressure works for him, makes him feel better, this is according to his OT at school. I'm not sure why this works, but it does.)
He struggled for a bit. I let him. He needed to work it out. He finally, after I messaged his back, calmed down enough, that I let him go. By now it is well past midnight, and he has that wild eyed look still. It is tempered somewhat, but he still has it.
So I lay in bed with him, and we chat. He holds my hand and we are still chatting. He is calming more and more down, and I can visibly see him relaxing. I know he will fall asleep. However I can't leave him, because I don't want him to wake up in a frenzy and me not be there. I just had to stay with him. So I did. Waking every 15 minutes or so to make sure he was ok.
It was a long night.
He didn't go to school. There was no way I was going to send him to school exhausted and teetering on the edge of sanity. I also made a doctor appointment for him, but that won't be until next week. I hope this is it for the cycling. However he hasn't been this bad off in a long time and I think we are in for more fits of rage.
I feel so bad for my boy. I just want to make it all better for him. Some things, even a mom can't do.