Monday, June 28, 2010



Yesterday was our 12 year. Today is the 12 year of the day I found out I was going to be a mom.

Yesterday, a friend invited us all over for dinner. As per usual I got the head count told Rob, and then as always told him we could and should opt out. I don't like to make him uncomfortable. After a bit of back and forth he decided we should go. I asked about 150 times if he was sure. He said yes. Silly me, I should have said nah, maybe some other time. However my esp skills were lacking yesterday.

We get there and are told that more people are going to show up, then previously expected. Que the internal oh fuck dialogue in my head. I knew I would be blamed, get in trouble and otherwise made to feel bad about this. At that point I suppose I should have said, oh, oops sorry we have to go. But I didn't.

We stayed. Rob and Spenser got in the pool.

I helped my friend in the kitchen, like she asked, because well I am a wizard in the kitchen.

Apparently though this meant I left a 41 year old child and 11 year old boy to fend for themselves. Yikes. I didn't even think about it. Don't know why, must be out of practice. Anyway.

By the time dinner was ready, Rob was almost jumping out of his skin. Spenser wasn't much better. So we shoveled in the food, which was pretty good--I love chinese 5 spice, and then bid a hasty retreat.

Once in the car, the demeanor changed. I knew that I was going to get reamed.

Happy 12th anniversary, you fucking left me alone. This was not fun for me. You left me alone with people I do not know. Spenser was miserable, I was miserable. Blah, blah, blah, your fault, your fault your fault.

I hope I can make next year as special as this year was.

Each day is better then the next.

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